Chapter 2 ~ Me, Pursue Passion?
Theme ~ God wants you to pursue passion in your marriage!
In Scripture, God gave us a living example of a woman who knew how to use her power: the Bride in Song of Solomon. We call her the Smokin’ Hot Mama. We share what we have learned from her about God’s desire for a wife to pursue passion and why intimacy requires pursuit.
Let me set the stage for this chapter with a direct quote from Dr. Juli Slattery. It is from page thirty-one of the workbook.
Every Mother's Day in recent memory, it seems that I have been confronted with the "wonder woman" of the Bible, the Proverbs 31 woman, who exemplifies a virtuous mother, wife, and community leader. I've practically memorized this section of Scripture--not because I've tried to commit it to memory but because I've read and heard the passage preached so many times.
Recently I met a new heroine in the Bible in an unlikely place. Actually, she is found in a book that for many years I just didn't understand--Song of Solomon. Like the Proverbs 31 woman, her name is not given, so I'll call her the "Smokin' Hot Mama" (SHM for short). I think SHM is even more inspiring and more convicting than Mrs. Proverbs 31! Yet, strangely, I can find no Bible studies extolling her virtues or exalting her as an example. As a young wife, no one ever pulled me aside and said, "Be like her!" Yet my guess is that most husbands, if forced to choose, would rather have an SHM than a Proverbs 31 wife.
Perhaps churches don't put a lot of emphasis on SHM, but God's Word seems to. Look at it this way . . . the P31 woman gets half a chapter with 21 verses while SHM gets eight chapters with 117 verses. I think it's worth discovering why.Now that's some food for thought! After reading that I began thinking about the first time I stumbled upon Song of Solomon. The memory of it can make me laugh right out loud. I was probably about nine or ten and by that time I was a voracious reader. Earlier my pastor's daughter, who was a few years older than me, had clued me in on the scandalous happenings contained in that book. Well of course I had to investigate for myself!
I shut my bedroom door and curled up with my Children's Living Bible . . . you remember the one . . . it had Jesus and all the children on the front cover. I had one of those mommas that could sniff out trouble a mile away and my closed bedroom door was clue number one. When she entered my room I was pretty deep into the story . . . and oh my what a story! I quickly shut the book and unsuccessfully tried to look not guilty. Unfortunately I didn't have the foresight to remove my finger as a place holder. When she saw what I had been reading she got all red in the face and proceeded to lecture me about not reading things like that.
Of course at that time I didn't have the theology to defend myself. I didn't know to argue the fact that it is a book that is God inspired and breathed. As I said it makes me laugh now but for years I think I thought of the marriage union as something to be ashamed of.
In our society we seem to want to separate things into God things and secular thing. Sex would definitely fall into the secular things category. Much of what we learn about sex is shrouded in shame. How sad is that? Even in our Christian circles we major on the don'ts. Don't do this, and definitely don't do that. If you're thinking about that it is wrong, wrong, wrong!
The funny thing is, God's Word tells us in Phillipians 4:8 "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." He goes on to tell us in Hebrews that the marriage bed is holy and undefiled.
So friends, I say let's latch onto that! As Juli and Linda put it, God has given us a permission slip in our marriage to not only think about enjoying each other but to actually do it. I say God's edict trumps my momma's every. single. time!
If this is a topic that interests you and you'd like to read our other articles check out Pursuing Passion: What Kind of Love Are You Making and Chapter 1: I've Got Power and Chapter 3: God's Got An Opinion! and Chapter 4: Making Truth Stick
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